I don't know what you're going through now, but don't feel shitty about yourself and certainly don't jump off a cliff. I think you're a beautiful person with a fantastic personality and you may not believe me or think this sounds cliché but you're worth so much more than you think, and you're definitely not a whale. And maybe this is less of a deal than I'm making it, but I won't stand for amazing people talking bad about themselves. Stay safe. Sincerely, a friendly anon.